When I become Queen of the World (yeah, here we go again), I'm going to have Respect Police. It seems to me that much of what's wrong with the world could be fixed or at least improved if people were more respectful of each other.
Now, that said, I don't always follow that advice. I tend to yell a lot, at least when pushed. I don't have much patience and sometimes that shows as a lack of respect for folks. I have sensory issues and when I'm on overload, all respect is gone. I need sound to stop and stop now.
I decided to try something a little different today. I didn't really make a decision to change per se but I did wake up deciding today was going to be a better day. I woke up the girls in a kind, friendly way (this is our routine until a certain someone refuses to get out of the bed. Then voices get raised - but not today!). I was a little late so I asked them to get ready quickly, get breakfast and start on lunches while I showered and got ready for work. By the time I got out of the shower, there was yelling and tears. But none from me. I gave them hugs, told them all would be okay and got everyone back on track. I did that a handful of times. I politely redirected behavior when necessary and managed to get everyone on the bus and me to work, all on time. Pah!
At the end of their day, I picked them up from the bus. Hugs for all. Now, none of this is particularly unusual. We hug a lot; we laugh a lot. But usually at some point voices usually get raised. Not today.
Homework started. Many hours later, it's all done. We lounge on the couch, watch silly videos on youtube, manage to find something to eat for dinner and laugh a lot. There were two, count 'em - TWO, episodes of whining and/or tattling. That's all. When it was time for bed, one request was all it took. Kisses for all, sweet dreams set. Quiet. Respect works.