Wednesday, May 22, 2013

If you can't say anything nice......

Be quiet.

That's not the first thing that came to my mind.  "Shut the fuck up" came to mind but "be quiet" sounds nicer.  This is going to be the new Judi mantra.

One of my facebook friends posted the quote from the Buddhist Boot Camp site.  It struck me because I hear myself telling my kids "listen to your tone", "say something nice", "words hurt" often.  It doesn't stop.  I hear the nastiness all too often.

I hear (and cause) too much nastiness in my life.  I yell at the dumbass drivers who feel the need to drive 40 mph on the beltway and the douchebags who seem to have forgotten how to use a turn signal.  I hear my kids yell at each other and talk snarkily about the mean girls at school.

Enough is enough.

So I will try to stop calling drivers dumbasses and douchebags (DAs and DBs in the code world of speaking in front of kids - which, for the record, doesn't work.  They figure out what you're saying.).  I will not call people who piss me off bad names.  My mother used to have a more Christian strategy.  When people are that stupid, they need a prayer.  When they piss you off, say a prayer for them.  I like that but we are of different religious beliefs.  However, when these people piss me off, I can send them a happy thought.

I called someone out on this recently.  This is someone who I care about - I wasn't willing to just say well, that person is being a dick so I'm done.  But I told him a comment he said to a business owner wasn't okay.  Rarely do I get full-on, red faced angry.  I was when I heard his comment.


I explained why I thought it was wrong and why I don't want the nastiness in my life any more.  My point was made.  He's entitled to his opinion - I'm fine with that.  But when you cross the line into nastiness, keep it to yourself.

And that includes me.  I'm working on keeping the nastiness in check.  If I can't be positive, I'll be quiet.

Now, if only that message could be heard in the tween world......

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