Life Through Someone Else's Eyes
It's a new year so maybe I'll start writing again. In fairness, I write a fair amount I don't publish because it's angry or whiny. Neither is how I want to be remembered.
We spent our New Years Eve in Baltimore on a frigid cold night waiting for fireworks. We went to the Kona Grill as we have in years past. I love their aquarium and there's something there we all like, so it's a perfect way to end the year.
Our waitress was interesting. At first I guessed she was around my age. Then I figured she was younger. She was chatty with my girls. I thought she was just being friendly but then she talked to us for a bit. She had a lot of thoughts about the fact my teenage girls were with me on this party night - and they were there voluntarily. She told us a brief rendition of her life story - pregnant and unmarried at 25, later married with a couple of kids and a step daughter (so I'll assume a divorce and remarriage in there but I didn't actually ask). Judging by looks alone, she's had a harder life than I have. She referred to herself as an "old lady" several times. I finally told her I was pretty sure she was younger than me so maybe finding an adjective other than old might be good. Her comments about me looking to be in my late 30s or early 40s were just flattery, I was pretty sure. Then she asked me questions. You're not a smoker, are you? I'm a former smoker (I didn't mention the number of years). White women who smoke have lines. They look older. Not untrue and it became clear she was a smoker. Then she asked why the girls were with us on New Years. They wanted to be with us? Did I know how lucky I was? This was a fairly long conversation. I'm curious if her other customers noticed.
We paid and were getting ready to leave when I went back to thank her. She made me feel happy by being surprised I was 50 and I appreciated the reminder to be thankful for my very chatty, kind of clingy, funny kids. We're hitting the time where I feel the time crunch. One and a half years of high school left. Not many more New Years Eves watching fireworks, drinking Martinellis and eating junk food in a pricey hotel room. Soon friends, jobs, life and responsibilities will get in the way. Do you know how lucky you are? She reminded me of that a few times.
Yes, I do.
This will by my year to not only remember it but to make the most of it.
We spent our New Years Eve in Baltimore on a frigid cold night waiting for fireworks. We went to the Kona Grill as we have in years past. I love their aquarium and there's something there we all like, so it's a perfect way to end the year.
Our waitress was interesting. At first I guessed she was around my age. Then I figured she was younger. She was chatty with my girls. I thought she was just being friendly but then she talked to us for a bit. She had a lot of thoughts about the fact my teenage girls were with me on this party night - and they were there voluntarily. She told us a brief rendition of her life story - pregnant and unmarried at 25, later married with a couple of kids and a step daughter (so I'll assume a divorce and remarriage in there but I didn't actually ask). Judging by looks alone, she's had a harder life than I have. She referred to herself as an "old lady" several times. I finally told her I was pretty sure she was younger than me so maybe finding an adjective other than old might be good. Her comments about me looking to be in my late 30s or early 40s were just flattery, I was pretty sure. Then she asked me questions. You're not a smoker, are you? I'm a former smoker (I didn't mention the number of years). White women who smoke have lines. They look older. Not untrue and it became clear she was a smoker. Then she asked why the girls were with us on New Years. They wanted to be with us? Did I know how lucky I was? This was a fairly long conversation. I'm curious if her other customers noticed.
We paid and were getting ready to leave when I went back to thank her. She made me feel happy by being surprised I was 50 and I appreciated the reminder to be thankful for my very chatty, kind of clingy, funny kids. We're hitting the time where I feel the time crunch. One and a half years of high school left. Not many more New Years Eves watching fireworks, drinking Martinellis and eating junk food in a pricey hotel room. Soon friends, jobs, life and responsibilities will get in the way. Do you know how lucky you are? She reminded me of that a few times.
Yes, I do.
This will by my year to not only remember it but to make the most of it.
You are lucky. They are lucky, too! You have created a space where they feel loved and accepted and you add zest to their lives. I feel lucky to know you too.
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