What would Judi do?

Anyone who knows me knows that summer is my favorite time of the year.  The days are long and warm, the flowers are pretty, and it's just a happy time. Alissa over at Clever Compass (www.clevercompass.com) picked the topic of Summer Traditions for this weeks Friday 5.  To limit it to 5 will be tough..... 1.  Fireworks.  On the fourth of July and every other time I can find them.  I am a fireworks junkie (others use a different, not inaccurate word).  I travel for fireworks.  And I never leave until I'm 110%  sure they're completely done. 2.  Piggies in the sand.  I love beaches.  Ocean City, NJ is my beach of choice (my kids concur) but really I don't turn down a trip to any beach.  We go shark tooth hunting at Chesapeake Beach.  Any beach is our friend. 3.  The Montgomery County Fair.  We haven't missed one since my kids were born.  And I had been going for years before that.  I miss the pig m...

What have you done to make a difference to someone today? That's our new goal.  And it's working.  Let me explain. I have grown tired of the mean girl crap, the sisterly bickering, the constant " you are (insert insult)  !"  I'm tired of it all.  Yelling back didn't work.  Asking them to re-evaluate how they speak to each other didn't work.  Grounding didn't work.  The nastiness continued.  It happens at both my house and their dad's.  We're both tired of it. Then I was watching the end of the Ellen Degeneres Show.  Yeah, I admit I like Sophia Grace and Rosie.  I can't help it.  Anyway, I digress.  At the end of her show, Ellen says something along the lines of "be nice to people".  That got me thinking. So I told my girls that from now on, on a daily basis, they are to do something that makes a positive difference to someone.  It's working.  A wonderful transformation is occurring.  ...

My kids asked to join an after school program called Girls On The Run (GOTR) this spring.  It's been a great experience for them.  Twice a week for an hour after school the girls do self esteem building activities and run.  A lot.  It's been great for them. Yesterday they participated with about 3000 other girls from all over the county to run 5k at the fairground.  It was a great experience for them - and for me.  I was reminded again how important doing something as simple as saying "great job!" to someone can be. A asked if I would take one of the signs they made for my walk so I could cheer for them.  It hadn't really occurred to me to do that but it was an easy enough request, so why not.  It was easily the best thing I've done for a while. The sign I took said "You're awesome!".  As the girls ran past, some said thank you!  S ome said Yes, I am!.   Some of the buddy runners (parents) said "See?  People think you're ...

I like going to the movies but I always forget that I do.  If someone suggests going to a movie, I'll go.  Rarely do I ever say "Hey!  Let's go to the movies!"  I should remember to do that more often. The Friday 5's theme this week is movies.  My mind is racing!  But it's funny because M just asked me yesterday what my favorite movie was.  I couldn't come up with one.  I have a few: 1.  The Rocky Horror Picture Show - not because it's a great movie but because it shaped my life so much.  The experience of going - of fitting in! - was amazing.  I loved the freakiness of it all.  I still do! 2.  Rear Window - I wanted to be Grace Kelly.  She was beautiful, wore fabulous clothes - she was perfect.  I wanted Jimmy Stewart to rescue me.  I love this movie. 3.  The Sound of Music -  I wanted my mom to marry Christopher Plummer.  He was gorgeous - he had a bristle-ish exterior but the...

During some point in my marathon walk training, I complained that I couldn't walk with my kids because they wanted to hold my hands when we walked and I couldn't do that during training.  A friend of mine remarked how lucky I was to have kids - almost age 11 - who still want  to hold my hand while walking.  That comment has stayed with me and made me realize how lucky I am. My kids still want to be tucked in at night.  The ritual is always the same.  I sit on the edge of the bed (they have bunk beds but want to sleep together in the same bed).  I tell them I love them.  They tell me they love me.  They ask "Mommy, what should I dream about tonight?"  If I'm in an ornery mood the answer might be cicadas (something that creeps M out) or homework.  Usually it's something like butterflies, the beach, or something related to our day.  I tickle them a bit and we laugh before going to sleep. Waking has its own rituals, at least on scho...

Being a daughter and a mother makes me feel like the fluffy stuff in an Oreo.  I've written lots about my kids and some about the frustrations I experience being the daughter of my mother.  It wasn't always frustrating.  I grew up intensely proud of her.  I'm not sure she knows that. I had the only single mom I knew for most of my life.  No one else had a parent who died.  No one else had just a mom.  Certainly no one had a mom like mine. Before my mother was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease, she was a force to be reckoned with. She left home when she was young - Allentown, PA didn't hold much of a future for her and she didn't want to be married off to someone and stay there for the rest of her life.  So she didn't.  She took correspondence courses to learn about the airline industry.  Then she lied to her parents and told them she had a job in New York City and off she went.  But she didn't have a job.  S...

This is going to be a long one.  Go get a drink first.  I have lots to say and I want to get it all out before I forget things. First, I did it.  Wow.  I was really afraid there for a while I'd have to say I tried but didn't do it.  So this is a relief.  But what a journey this has been. When I started this, I had all sorts of thoughts and delusions about it.  I thought I would walk 39.3 miles and everything would be okay.  I thought Ruth would be there with Mike and the girls and all would be fine.  Before we signed on, Amanda asked if I would be able to do this if Ruth didn't live to see it.  Yes, of course I would (because she wasn't going to die, but I didn't say that).  Then she died. And I was the only one who was surprised. Still, I walked.  I thought walking would make it all okay.  It didn't.  It gave me purpose, a goal, but it didn't make everything okay.  I'm really not sure why I thought it ...

It's here.  Tomorrow I walk.  It seemed so far away in January.  It was closer than I thought. I've walked well over 100 miles in training.  I've discovered parts of Silver Spring, Bethesda, DC and all parts in between that I never paid attention to before.  I got a great new friend out of the deal.  Walking has been like therapy - we walk, talk about our week.  It feels strange to know that it'll be over soon. Reading the posts on facebook, seeing the donations people gave me - it's overwhelming to think of all the support people are giving me.  My heart is happy. It didn't do the one thing I thought it might:  it didn't make it all better.  I'm still sad at the loss of my mother in law.  I'm still sad and nervous for my friends battling this disease - and there are several of them.  The feeling of loss is still there. But there are two good things that happened.  I feel like I made a difference.  I raised a ...

People who shaped me..... This is an interesting topic for me.  I have so many folks who contributed to making me who I am - and most of them have no idea.  A few of them did, though, and really did impact my life in ways I didn't understand until much later in my life. 1. My mother.  I write about how she makes me bonkers now but growing up I knew early on she was pretty strong.  My dad died when I was a baby and she raised my brother and me by herself.  She didn't get much help from her family and she would rarely ask anyone for help.  She was always strong, which might be why seeing her now - elderly, disabled and stubborn -is hard for me.  She allowed me to be different from everyone else.  Really, she made me who I am today. 2.  Mr. Aiken - I wrote about him earlier (he wasn't my dad).  He was in many ways the closest thing I had to a dad growing up.  He was a lousy teacher but in our personal lives he was very impor...